I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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