i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
