It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
