dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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