maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
