The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Randomize
