I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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