just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
