Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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