he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
