talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
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