we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Randomize