If i come over, it means nothing
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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