i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
im six kinds of drunk right now
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Randomize
