Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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