i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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