These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
