i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
she smelled like a LAN party
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize