Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
