Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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