Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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