We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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