last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
