Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
