How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize