Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
