Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
