don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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