i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize