So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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