I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
