no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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