My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
