Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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