i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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