It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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