She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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