Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize