Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize