I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
