so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
