i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
