those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Randomize
