and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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