there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize