In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
i will never coherently bang her
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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