I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
