Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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