Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Randomize