It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
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