ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Randomize
